Sometime in August of 2008, myself and my good friends Mandy and Spinner went to see my favorite band of all time, Minus The Bear. MTB performed at a venue in Ft. Lauderdale, FL called Revolution Live. The way the venue is designed; there's the main floor where the bars and seats are, the second floor via staircase (will be an important detail soon), and the "dance floor" or the "pit" which is a sub-level in the center of the venue about 7 feet below the first floor (also via staircase).
The first band 27 played. They were mediocre at best with deep ambient tones and weird nature sounds throughout the entire set. The second band to perform was Annuals, and they were all that and a bag of chips. Annuals nearly changed my life when I saw them, as they were near perfection with their powerful mix-genre experience that everyone should partake in.
The third and headlining act was of course Minus The Bear. Midway through the set, I felt a slight discomfort in my stomach as it was most likely the pre-show Taco Bell we ate on the way to the show. I had to fart, as it seems. I'm standing in the middle of a crowd of 200 people so I fire away. Turns out my body wants revenge on me and instead of a fart creeping out of my ass, I shit my fucking pants.
I shit my pants in the middle of the set of my favorite band of all time.
Instantly, I regretted ever eating food in general and thinking that farting was a swell idea. I shuffle my embarrassed self out of the dance floor and realize that all off the restrooms are upstairs.
With chocolate cake in my pants and between my fat cheeks, I need to awkwardly walk up the stairs and back around the venue to the restrooms where I spent the next 20 minutes cleaning myself up in shame. I was 18 years old and I shit myself in a public facility.
This was never mentioned to anybody until 8 months ago when this whole "Beav My Life" idea started by some crazy friends. Leave it to your friends to gain notoriety from your troubles.
1 comment:
more stories!!!!!!!!!!!! plz
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